Day 6 – What You Are Afraid Of
To be honest, there are lots of things I’m afraid of. I’m the type of person who can feel like they fear everything. Not literally everything, but more than most. There was a time when I was afraid of dying. I have no idea why I felt this way, I just did.
I’m not afraid of creepy crawlies, I just don’t like them. Ok that was a lie, if I see them I bring out the blow torch. Haha, only kidding, but they do give me the heebie jeebies and when you have mild anxiety so that doesn’t help with fears. Also makes me way more paranoid.
I guess another thing I’m afraid of (if this is a “thing” to be afraid of) is not reaching my full potential in life and always being stuck in a rut and not really growing as a person. At times I get so lost in trying to find myself and I end up doing things just because I have to, not because I want to. It doesn’t really make me happy. More like temporary satisfaction.
But to get back to the topic at hand. What am I afraid of? Let’s see, sometimes I’m afraid of being in the dark all alone. I’m sometimes afraid of growing old alone. Not that that’s a major issue, but who doesn’t want someone loving by their side to grow old with and have great long lasting memories with.
One thing I can say is, that ever since I moved to a new world and new country with new everything, I’ve had to adjust, adapt and get used to certain things and ways of life. So there have been some things that before I would have no problem with, but now..there seems to be a slight worry. Like riding a bike on the road. The roads here and terribly busy (and you aren’t really allowed/supposed to ride on the sidewalk) and there are some reckless drivers, that’s something I cannot do without worrying something will go bad. Then again, there are certain places where roads are not busy and you get to see some spectacular views. That’s just one example. Being in an elevator. That’s something I try to avoid (more so if I’m alone). It stems from a young age. The thought of being trapped in a confined space and having to wait God knows how long to get help and be let out. Not something I even want to think about. I’d rather take the stairs any day.
Wow I’m not doing too well with this topic today am I?
I tend to fear irrational things in a way. Things that I really shouldn’t, I do. But like I said before, it’s not so much that I’m afraid, its that I don’t like it so much or putting myself in such situations that will make me feel very uneasy and uncomfortable and have me running for the hills.
Hopefully these little fears will subside and I can breathe a little better and feel better about certain things and situations.
I do apologise for those who read this, I know its muddled and stuff. Not one of my best postings, but I hope to be better with the next one.
Till next time
Stay safe and have a great day 🙂