Move half way across the world – Check
Live in said area for 7 years without much success – Check
Get so frustrated with life and everything else – Check
Decide it’s time to leave and try my luck somewhere – Check
Move to different place to try my luck – Check
Continue the struggle – Check
Cry, be frustrated and want to give up every day – Check
Achieve at least one thing I came out here to get – HECK YEAH!
The story so far..
I left home on the 3rd of February 2017 with a few pangs of guilt.
I was between a rock and a hard place. On the one hand I knew I had to do something. Change something in my life for things in it to get better. I knew that the thing I had to do was leave and move to a different place. But like I said, I had mixed feelings about it all.
But I did it. I took the step. Decided it was now or never. I left everything I had known for the past 7 and half years and moved. It was a good thing that I had a specific area to move to so that was one problem sorted.
Deciding to leave was both easy and difficult. I was glad about where I heading but kinda sad about what (more like who) I was leaving behind.
I was going to a place I’d only been a few times before. I was going alone. I was going to BE on my own.
It was a scary thought. Being someplace new and on my own. But I’m the sort of person who doesn’t mind being left to their own devices so I knew I’d be somewhat ok. It did help that I was going to a place and knew a few people so in a sense I wouldn’t be completely on my own, but I still kinda would be.
Anyway, like I said, things weren’t working out for me where I was so I left there, moved and here I am.
So what have the past few months been like for me since I made that crazy decision to leave? Pretty much the same as before I left, only a lot more tearful and a whole lot more stressful.
So many times I doubted myself about everything. There were times when I thought yep, it’s over, time to admit defeat and go back home. I even started looking at how much it would cost to get a one way ticket back.
But luckily I persevered through all the tears and disappointment to keep carrying on and keep on fighting.
Long story short, I’ve somehow managed to land myself a job.
Yes! I finally did it!!!
Took me a long while but I’ve achieved one of many things I hope to while I’m out here.
In the words of Benjamin Mee “You know, sometimes all you need is twenty seconds of insane courage. Just literally twenty seconds of just embarrassing bravery. And I promise you, something great will come of it.”
When the odds are up against you, try, try and try again. Don’t give up. Don’t let defeat defeat you (if that makes any sense).
Anywhoo, that’s my big news. After soo many years of trying, crying, being defeated and let down, I am slowly but surely trying to get my life together.
It’s been a long road to hoe, but I know I’m going to make it.
One step at a time 🙂